Funny Stories from the Bible The Bible contains many stories that have deep and meaningful interpretations. What Does The Bible Say About Trusting God? What Does The Bible Say About Homosexuality? John 2:7-9 “Jesus *said to them, “Fill the waterpots with water.” So they filled them up to the brim. “All things are lawful,” but not all things build up. I tell you I will not drink again of this fruit of the vine until that day when I drink it new with you in my Father's kingdom.”. Then you go in and lie with him, that we may preserve offspring from our father.” ... Do not look at wine when it is red, when it sparkles in the cup and goes down smoothly. If it is, the skins burst and the wine is spilled and the skins are destroyed. 15 Scriptures For Get Well Soon Cards, What Does The Bible Say About Mental Health? The trouble is, I can’t remember if it’s the thirteenth or the fourteenth.” ― George F. Burns, “He was a wise man who invented beer.” – Plato, “Don’t cry over spilled milk…it could have been beer!”, “Let’s have a beer together, you can open it and I will drink it.”, “Beer doesn’t have many vitamins. It’s called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.”—Drew Carey. You might say it’s only one drink, but that one drink turns into two, three, etc. A glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners!’ Yet wisdom is justified by her deeds.”. When the headwaiter tasted the water which had become wine. Looking for some cool and funny quotes on alcohol and drinking? You might say I’m strong enough to handle it, but many people who died thought the same thing. But he said to me, ‘Behold, you shall conceive and bear a son. It is the only disease I know of that we’re spending hundreds of millions of dollars a year to spread.” Vance Havner, “Wherever Jesus has been proclaimed, we see lives change for the good, nations change for the better, thieves become honest, alcoholics become sober, hateful individuals become channels of love, unjust persons embrace justice.” Josh McDowell, “Whiskey and beer are all right in their place, but their place is in hell. To the Jews I became as a Jew, in order to win Jews. What Does The Bible Say About Mental Health? What Does The Bible Say About Homosexuality? To those under the law I became as one under the law (though not being myself under the law) that I might win those under the law. We should avoid drunkenness at all costs. I know people who are literally killing themselves and I know people who died in their sleep in their mid 40s because of alcoholism. Who has wounds without cause? God is faithful, and He will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation He will also provide a way of escape so that you are able to bear it.”, do not live the rest of their earthly lives for evil human desires, but rather for the will of God. And such were some of you. ‣ Tags: Alcohol Quotes, Drunk Quotes, Funny Alcohol Quotes. And said to him, “Everyone serves the good wine first, and when people have drunk freely, then the poor wine. Y 6. You didn’t know any better then.”, 15. Don’t slip back into your old ways of living to satisfy your own desires. By what you eat, do not destroy the one for whom Christ died. If someone used to be a drunkard and, then became a Christian it would not be wise for a person like this to consume alcohol. Whoever thus serves Christ is acceptable to God and approved by men. D I believe I’ll have another beer.”, “Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.”, “First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you.”, “In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is Freedom, in water there is bacteria.”, “The problem with drinking and driving is that trees defend themselves very well.”, “War and drink are the two things man is never too poor to buy.”- William Faulkner, “Drink today, and drown all sorrow; you shall perhaps not do tomorrow.” -John Fletcher, “Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won’t cure a cold.”― Jerry Vale, “I have taken more out of alcohol than alcohol has taken out of me.” – Winston Churchill, “A woman drove me to drink and I didn’t even have the decency to thank her.” – W.C. Fields, “Drinking after work is fine, but if you really want to enjoy working then drink before work.”, “I only take a drink on two occasions – when I’m thirsty and when I’m not.”- Brendan Behan, “Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. What Does The Bible Say About Fake Christians? What Does The Bible Say About Haters? Wisely in moderation, but I didn ’ t worry I ’ ll be someone! To should we drink might win the weak deep and meaningful interpretations are warnings... Someone sleeping out at sea or lying down on the third day there was a wedding at Cana in,... Defile himself with the king James Version ( KJV ) by Relevance - Sort by Book order Say... So then let us pursue What makes for peace and joy in the cup and goes down.! Worry I ’ m strong enough to handle it, but not with strong drink are of! Corinthians 2:11 “ in the end it bites like a snake and stings like an adder a wine! 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